


We're All Going to Die: A Farmer's Journal

by StolenVampires



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Comedy, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-30
Updated: 2016-03-20
Packaged: 2018-04-28 22:01:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5107226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StolenVampires/pseuds/StolenVampires
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A Farmer begins a journal, marking what he expects is the end of the world while just trying to tend to his crops and livestock in the Hinterlands.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 9:41 Dragon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All I wanted was to have a simple life.

So well, figured that now that the world is ending, it was a good a time as any to begin writing down my last days. Sky is opening, demons roamin. All I wanted to do was settle down, find a nice lass and have few littles with. But I guess the Maker wasn't thinkin bout none of that when the sky opened and things went all green. Mages and templars fighting didn't help much either. Maybe the chantry strife is what caused it all, but I like to think it wasn't the people's fault. We're just simple people. 

I am anyway. 

But the world is ending, and our supposed savior is some qunari they're callin the 'Herald of Andraste'. Maker has a sense of humor if so. Rip open the sky, send a qunari to save us. I'd laugh if it wasn't going to likely be the death of me. 

Thought it was a bit odd that I kept seeing the Herald of Andraste running bout hills though. It's an odd band of misfits with them too. A seeker lady, some beardless dwarf, and a scrubby looking elf who I think is in their sleep wear still. I knew it was the herald though. Qunari horns and all.  
But they seem to be busy. I hope they can at least get some of the fighting to stop. Waking up to flashing magic from mages just over the hills hasn't been good for my health.  
Or my crops.


	2. I guess I can't complain, they weren't my goats

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In where soup is made.

I honestly haven't much a clue what the herald keeps doing, running round with them folks. I see her passing by regularly now, and sometimes they stop by, picking herbs. Mostly elfroot. Makes sense though, stuff is like weeds here, and anyone worth their salt can use it for a healing salve in a pinch. Imagine the herald gets pinched a lot in that bulky armor. I have a feeling that the pinched the armor too.

I mean, looting I understand, but that's the herald. New armor doesn't fall from the sky. I mean sure the occasional demon does but not armor. Still, it's a war out past the fields, and I'll not be minding them and her holy ways or lack of. Maker chose her well. Soup is not thick enough tonight though, so I'll have to let it sit longer.

 

Maker's humor seems a tad grim seeing how more of those green things ripped open down in the valley. Becker lost two goats to what we think was an envy demon. 

Made me stop envying his goats right quick I'll tell you wot. 

 

Still, the herald picking weeds off the roadside and looting corpses for supplies- She has a dang seeker and everyone knows the Chantry coffers never run dry. Plus a dwarf? With no beard? Bet he can't even hold his ale so he's probably got some good coin. The elf though?  
I haven't a clue. I'm still wondering how anyone can run around in their sleeping gown barefoot in this cold. Elves I knew were a bit loony, but that one just seems loonier than most.

Another demon just fell from the sky.

 

+2 potatoes. Makes the soup more filling, but still could use more mutton. Not the demon touched stuff Becker keeps offering. Green meat doesn't sit right with me.


	3. March

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mages.

Been a while since I wrote down me thoughts. The Herald went down to the little templar hold out apparently and well. Mages haven't taken too kindly to it. Some Magister took over apparently and now that the chantry can't run the circles, (or what be left of them even)? I dunne trust no vints. Not even very charming ones that come to my door asking if I got any warm beds for a weary traveler. Said he was off to help the herald. Load of rubbish that is. 

Bullocks.   
He probably gonne just stalk her qunarisness and report back to that black divine or whoever runs the show in that magic pit. Still, Dennet down the ways apparently went off to go help the Herald. Left his missus and land behind. Half a fool half a genius. If it works for him he'll have some good coin. If not well.

Maybe I'd be able to buy their land. 

Still, today the mages began marching and I got the feeling they're not gonne be to friendly to whoever they're marching too.  
Marker preserve us.


End file.
